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See, higher education is of great importance in Germany, and college is virtually free — the key word here being .

My wife and I were once walking along Georgstraße in Hannover when we stumbled across a huge group of angry college students protesting against rising tuition fees in Lower Saxony.

He didn’t think his countrymen were any taller than mine, but suggested if there ingenious theory, however, was that German winters typically last longer than those in the States, resulting in less sunlight and an overall deficiency of vitamin D.

I went on to explain, beer in hand, how this would logically require the human body to adapt in order to increase surface area, resulting in a lanky populace better equipped to absorb sunlight.

The abundance of meat, bread and beer certainly hasn’t made any sexier, so what the hell man? Maybe it’s greater emphasis on walking and cycling as means of daily transportation.